Where it really started was with Liam's journey to a diagnosis in 2006. I was brand new to the world of autism at that time, but thought I would know if my child was autistic because I learned about autism for a day in college. Of course as I am still discovering, autism is a life-long learning experience... not something you can cover in one class, one day in college.
In retrospect, I think baby Liam had more red flags than I realized at the time. He wasn't comforted by physical contact, but rather by movement and repetitive bouncing. I couldn't snuggle him to sleep, instead I had to bounce him repetitively in a bouncy chair. He walked on time but didn't start talking. Eye contact wasn't something he was interested in, nor was joint attention (but I didn't even know what that WAS at the time!)
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| Baby Liam |
Liam was a very fussy toddler, his emotions would change suddenly from happy to upset and I couldn't understand why. He was very high energy and had no interest in group activities. One day just after he turned two we were at our local Early Years Centre, it was circle time and Liam was just running laps around the group, becoming agitated if we tried to draw him in. The Resource Teacher on site asked me if I would be interested in a smaller group for Liam where he could practise social skills, and so our journey began. I told her all about him at our intake meeting - how he knew all of his colours, could name trucks and Thomas Engines, but couldn't call me 'Mommy" or tell me he was thirsty (I didn't realize at the time that I was describing a deficit of social communication). I talked about his bouncing and his giant emotions. By the time I left her office, my own words were dancing around my consciousness and I was starting to get concerned.
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| Toddler Liam days before his diagnosis |
The following week I took him to the paediatrician to ask for a referral to speech therapy and for preschool subsidy. I wasn't sure what was going on, but I figured a little extra help would be good. She asked a few questions and then told me she was concerned he may have autism. I just stood there for a minute.
What? Autism?
And so on that day our journey began. I got home and asked the 2006 version of Dr. Google what that meant... I found lists of symptoms and red flags and found that most of those lists described my boy. I started to see everything he did differently and analyze every move he made. I also discovered that day that I wasn't alone. There was a vast online community of parents going through exactly what I was with children so much like mine. I found them in chat rooms and on mySpace. I discovered that I had a community.
At that time in Toronto we waited a year to see a developmental paediatrician and have the diagnosis confirmed. It was a long, anxious year. We were lucky to have a good paediatrician who was willing to help me acquire subsidy to send him to preschool, fill out applications for financial support and make referrals as needed. Finally in 2007 his diagnosis was confirmed and our life's path was officially changed.
In the ten years since Liam's diagnosis, we've grown and adapted and learned to thrive as a family touched by autism. There are huge challenges and stunning victories. Some days I wonder what our lives would have been like if we lived a 'normal' life. But then I remind myself that this is OUR normal.
Later today, I will share the story of Phoenix's diagnosis. A very different journey for a very different kid.
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